BUT what happens when the abuser is a governmental agency? When that agency lies in court, distorts facts, withholds evidence, denies children their RIGHT to their biological family, and more? What then?
Sadly, this is happening MORE than I ever dreamed possible. I have been fighting for my nephew for over a year now. He was only 17 months when taken into custody. Within days I contacted Del Norte CPS to inquire on HOW to get my nephew. (Sadly, I was very naive back then.) I did EVERYTHING they asked and have been approved for relative placement TWICE, took fost/adopt classes, DOJ clearances, have an approved adoptive home study, went to court hearings, had (BEGGED for) visits with my nephew, sent photos, etc. and STILL I am without my nephew. He is in a fost/adopt home and they are FIGHTING me to adopt him.
I have been witness to countless (purposeful) errors on behalf of Del Norte CPS. WHY? I scream to myself! WHY would they do this? We are APPROVED biological family members who WANT him. The biological parents even signed him over to us!!
I use to believe that anyone who did NOT have their children or had CPS in their lives were guilty to some extent. I believe that no more. This particular CPS agency has purposely FOUGHT us to keep my nephew with the foster parents. They made a decision and then made the puzzle pieces to fit.
What I am trying to say is NEVER EVER assume that someone involved with CPS is guilty. I know that I will never do that again. My eyes are open and NOW I am reminded that we should NEVER judge others, especially before we know the facts. I said the FACTS!
My nephew is gorgeous but I would still love him if he was green, 3 inches tall, and smelled of skunk;) THAT is what family does. We love each other no matter what. Our government SAYS that relatives have preference. Our family codes READ that family has preference when a child is removed from a home. BUT what really happens is not always what should happen. EVEN if you do what is required, and then some.
BEWARE: What you DO NOT know about the system WILL HURT you and more importantly hurt your relative.
Here are some things I HIGHLY recommend.................
Read everything you can about the system in your state and county.
Ask questions to the social workers
Put EVERYTHING in writing (keep track of all contact information).
Put tracking numbers on ALL letters, packages, etc. to the child & agency.
ASK IF the child has a CASA worker, who it is, and contact them (let them know who you are and what you want).
Ask who the child's court appointed attorney is, contact them!!! (do NOT rely on CPS to do this for you!!) in our case the attorney did NOT know about me until I hired my own attorney! WHY hadn't CPS told the courts about
me? hmmm?
Visit the child, keep up or start a relationship! I KNOW how difficult this is even when the child lives 12 hours away: ask for phone visits, letters, photos, and visits. (send your own on a regular basis)
Fill out a visit summary form after EACH visit, send with proof(via certified letter, received stamp, tracking #) to CPS and keep a copy for you for future reference!
Keep a well documented timeline (organize receipts, phone bills, etc. for easy sharing to the courts, etc.)
KNOW their rules, regulations, W&I (Welfare & Institution) codes.
Join a support and or blog / bulletin group about foster care/ adoption, learn from other's mistakes and successes!!
Hire an attorney who will help you if you can afford to do so.
Take foster care / adoption classes (get certified).
Take CPR and First Aid classes (all adults in your home).
Apply for relative placement through CPS.
Attend court hearings (ask the Social worker and or the parent of the child for dates).
Be kind and honest but do NOT trust that the SW (Social Worker) is going to do the right thing, be SURE that they will by staying in contact.
Consider having bio parents sign over their rights BEFORE they are terminated. {as per 8700(f)} This is extreme but MAY be called for.
Have bio parents ASK in writing to have child placed with you (EVEN if out of county). IF RU (reunification services) are NOT terminated, then work out
a visit schedule for the child and parents with CPS & parents (ride the train if you have to!)
KNOW that once a foster parent has a child for 6 months they CAN fight you for that child in court.
ALSO know that NOT all biological Families, Foster Parents, CPS Workers, State Adoption Specialists, Lawyers, Judges, etc. are BAD or even GOOD. I am not generalizing ANY one group, just arming the willing relatives that are
ABLE to be approved through relative placement, adoptive home studies, etc.!
REMEMBER: IF you don't document it, it didn't happen!!!!! Or worse, they can slant it however they choose.
Below is a link that I feel is very important for people to see. I have found it very informative and helpful.
Fighting Child Protective Services False Accusations
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